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Sunday, July 29, 2007

Report from communist cell I, Eastern division

also known as my family. They are smart people, truly. And nice. So how can they parrot "Bush lied"? Typical exchange:

Beloved relative I: Capitalism is inherently corrupt.

BR II: (Pained look) But what is there that's better?

BR I: Communism!

BR II: But--I mean, look at didn't work for them, surely?

BR I: It's never been tried.

BR II: ? (Silence, look of disbelief)

This sort of thing is what I had to contend with, when the discussion turned to politics. In the hopes that other topics would be explored, I walked as through a minefield.

Some tenets of the creed:
Drug companies are greedy and bad. Big corporations are greedy and bad. Anyone with more money than me is greedy and bad, and probably stole the money anyway.

The un-health-insured are many, all of them sick with potentially fatal diseases, and are being turned away daily from the life-saving treatment they need by hard-hearted capitalists, mainly George Bush.

More money is needed for public transportation, whether anyone wants it or not.

The environment is in imminent danger. We might wake up tomorrow to find we have been globally warmed to death. Or frozen by nuclear winter. Bad either way.

If the environment doesn't get us, the pollutants currently being poured into the rivers out of sheer spite by evil manufacturers will poison us all.

The Christian right has taken over the country. Our civil rights have been trampled. Anyone who speaks his mind will probably disappear into a secret prison, never to be heard from again.

Bush should be impeached, censured, or at least sent to his room until he learns to behave.

The Iraqis were happier under good old Saddam Hussein.


airforcewife said...

So, you were discussing politics at my family's house?

Mine don't go for the communism angle, but all our rights have apparently been trampled.

miriam sawyer said...

There's nothing like trampling a right or two to give us unfeeling conservatives an appetite for dinner.

airforcewife said...

Well, running over elderly and orphans in our SUV's ranks up there, too.

miriam sawyer said...

Yeah, but those rights make a nice crunch underfoot, like Autumn leaves.

The Sanity Inspector said...

Ask them how they can believe that, if liberals should control the government and government should control everyone else, an infinite number of motivated, competent officials can be found, with an infinite amount of money to pay them.

SnoopyTheGoon said...

A family after me heart!

BTW, homeless, elderly and orphans make a nice crunch under the Hummer too. One just has to inquire about the appropriate tires - I swear it is not the audio system!