Thursday, January 18, 2007

Obsessed with shoes?

According to Rachel,

The average American woman owns 30 pairs of shoes; the average man: 15. I'm pretty sure I own more than 30; certainly more if slippers are entered into the equation as I believe I own four pairs of slippers alone. And that's just off the top of my head.

Only 30 pairs? How can they bear this dreary existence?

I'm not going to count my shoes, but I'm certain I have more than 30. Let's see: the spare room closet is overrun with shoes; my study contains at least 20 pairs, and there are some Summer shoes in the basement.

I'm aware that this is excessive. I am always giving shoes to the Goodwill, or there would be many more pairs stashed around the house. My problem is not discarding, it is acquiring. I cannot pass a shoe display without trying on several pairs and finding one that I cannot live without.

I am searching for the Platonic ideal shoe--one that is beautiful, sexy, comfortable, and goes with everything. So far, the ideal seems to elude me.

Shoes always seem to fit beautifully in the store, only to rub, pinch and squeeze my feet when I actually wear them. Some prove unwearable at once: they are too big, too small, or feel weird, like I am going to pitch forward on my face when I put them on. Others feel okay for a while, causing agony only after actually trying to walk somewhere in them.

I forgot to mention that my feet change shape from day to day; at times they are bigger, or smaller, or wider, or shorter. Also, when you get older, the pads of fat on the bottom of your feet wear away, the only time any fat in the body goes away of its own accord, making your poor foot bones more prone to hurt when you walk on hard surfaces.

So, as a practical matter, I only have about three pairs of shoes that are comfortable, day in and day out, and I wear them all the time.

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