Fake boobs and others

Neilochka wants to know why fake boobs can't be a bit more natural:

“When are they ever going to make fake boobs that don’t look like large bocce balls?”

I've only seen one pair that I could swear was fake: in the gym one day I encountered a woman whose boobs floated upward; they looked like helium balloons. They seemed to defy gravity. I watched in fascination to see if they would unmoor themselves from her chest and fly away.

The nice thing about fake boobs is that they are, well, self-supporting. Real boobs, large boobs, unfortunately need to be hoisted up like flags on a flagpole by some heavy-duty industrial bra that looks more like a truss than the cute flimsy things you see in the Victoria's Secret catalog.

Life is tough.