Loser

I bought a copy of Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers at the good Will store for $1, and it was worth every penny. The author proves that boys who were born in January and February are more likely to excel in hockey. They have an advantage over their classmates because they are older than boys born during the rest of the year, therefore more mature, stronger, etc, etc. I applied this knowledge to my own situation and gained a lot of insight. After leaving my commie progressive school at the age of 11, I was placed in the eighth grade, making me one and a half to two years younger than anyone else in the eighth grade. They were already 13 or more! I didn't stand a chance! I attribute every subsequent failure of my academic career to this fact. Mother and dad made me a loser!