A few weeks ago I was stranded at Philadelphia Airport without a ride, and I was forced to use the Old Lady card.  Fortunately, it succeeded, but the problem with using the Old Lady card is that you have to be an old lady before, during, and after employing the card.  There is no time off for good behavior, no furlough, no chance of a reprieve.  You never even get one day off.

Once upon a time I had a Cute Young Thing Card, but it expired and can never be renewed.