Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Who's pickier?

Men or women?

It all reminds me of poor Ron, who worked at our library for a while. Mostly he was known as Poor Ron, as in:
"Ron called in sick today."
"Oh, poor Ron."
or:
"Phone call for Ron."
"I think he went to lunch. Poor Ron."

Ron lived with his mother. I suspect she picked out his clothes. He gave all his money to Dr Atkins of diet fame. Atkins felt Ron's problem was carbs, and that he needed weekly vitamin shots. He was as thin as a rail and for lunch brought, not a sandwich or salad or slice of pizza like everyone else, but some Godawful mess prescribed by Atkins.

Poor Ron used to talk to me about his romantic problem, his problem being that he didn't have any romance whatever. I don't think he ever went out with a girl in his life. He wanted to place a personal ad in the local paper to see if he could meet someone.

I tried to help him formulate an ad, until I realized that Ron had exacting requirements. He wanted a woman between the ages of 25-28 (he was 42), 5'6" and 120 lbs. She had to be educated and successful, a good dancer...but you get the idea. Ron, the dork, wanted a woman who probably could snag Brad Pitt.

I don't know how his ad campaign turned out, but when he left us he was still alone, dressed by his mother, and getting weekly vitamin shots. I guess no lucky girl jumped at the chance to take on Ron.

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