from the Purple Avenger:
The digital pocket Koran
The perfect gift for stylish modern "on the go" jihadis who you're having a problem finding a gift for. Explosives can be difficult to obtain and tricky to transport/store. Firearms can get you into legal problems for executing a "strawman" purchase. The digital pocker Koran has none of these liabilities.
Stylish. Sleek. A marvel of modern electronic wizardry. The digital pocket Koran includes a built in clock/timer, cell phone, GPS, and special plug for hooking up detonators. You will be stylishly equipped for even the most demanding detonation scenarios.