Dennis Dale gives his take on the White House voice mail. Best bits:
If you are an alien being from another planet and would like to replace a current U.S. citizen, press three.
Welcome to the citizen replacement process. We currently have an unlimited number of slots open for carbon based life forms that wish to immigrate to the United States. If you'd like to learn more about how pod metamorphosis replacement works, press one. If you are a family member seeking to join a recent alien immigrant, press two. If you would like to recieve a brochure of available body types, press three. To inquire about regional availability, press four.
Stolen from dustbury.