Royalties!

I made 70 cents from my Amazon Kindle book.  I make more than that from my first book, published in 2002.

This is the front cover of "Nothing Much," a Kindle book.

We heard this tonight, but by Pyxis Quartet

Dynamite!

Me and Rasputin

About a year ago I fell right on my nose in the lobby of the Kimmel Center.  It hurt like hell, but. aside from two black eyes, I was essentially unharmed.  I looked grotesque, though.

Last Thursday, a dog knocked me down a (short) flight of stairs.  The sound of my head hitting the step was horrific.  Again, no damage, unless there are bruises  under my hair.

My father lived to be 99, and it took a dedicated team of doctors, at a renowned medical center, to kill him.

I am starting to feel like Rasputin; who I understand survived several attempts to kill him.  And that's all I know about Russian history, and probably all I ever will know.  

Nat Hentoff on Free Speech

First world problems

My broom has no home.  When I want to use it I take if from wherever it is standing, usually in the way, and after using it I leave it somewhere, usually in the way.  The somebody knocks it over.

Does anyone else have broom problems?  I never notice other people's brooms standing around waiting for someone to knock them over.  Other people have control of their brooms.

I have lost my last house key.  I never use them, because I come and go through the garage, but I think one should have a house key.  So I have to start thinking about a locksmith.

I let my husband's subscription to a magazine come to a close.  Then I ordered a new subscription  for myself.  Now I either have two subscriptions or none.  This requires action, but the thought of straightening it out makes me want to take a nap.

These are first world problems, right?  St Teresa said, in a quote that's too good to check, that life was a night spent in an uncomfortable inn.  Try to imagine a 16th century Spanish inn, where you had to share your bed with other travelers, some of whom probably smelled bad.  Now call a locksmith.

Happy Halloween

I hope it's not politically incorrect to call it that, instead of Autumn solstice or something;

Oil glut

My father and my brother the genius were so alike it scared me.  The first word ever applied to either one is "brilliant."  Both of them spent enormous amounts of effort on some cause.  My father spent four years trying to invent a sewing machine which would sew the toe of pantyhose invisibly.  He turned my brother's bedroom into a machine shop, surprising my brother when he came home from college  and had to sleep on a sofabed in the living room.  Dad had scores of patents on this machine, which proved difficult to design.  He became the world expert on pantyhose and was about to cash in worldwide when all the women of all  nations simultaneously decided they hated wearing pantyhose, discarded them, and started wearing trousers or going barelegged..  Even Anna Wintour.  And when you've lost Anna Wintour you've lost everyone who counts.

My brother the genius has a scheme for extracting energy from seawater.  Don't ask.  If he were rich he would devote all his time and resources to the project.  He also has lots of patents.  Needless to say, after the spectacular failure of wind and solar power nobody wants to listen.

When my mother was alive, he was convinced that all the natural gas in the world was going to be used up imminently, maybe within a year or two.  He actually ordered an oil burning furnace for her house.  When the installer came, the cleaning lady warned mother in time and was met with armed resistance and was forcefully ejected.  Thank heaven she caught him before the backhoe was applied to her rose garden.

It didn't take much acumen to consider him mistaken.  Just because someone is brilliant doesn't necessarily make him right.I felt in my gut that sooner or later,  there would be an oil glut and I was right.

Have a happy and healthy New Year

My future posts will all be about...

stealing soap from hotel rooms.  This is what brings people to my site.

It's all about the links!

Happy New Year

Bumper stickers

I strongly feel that any statement whatever is displayed on a bumper sticker or a t-shirt is rendered meaningless and banal by its context.  The medium is the message.

Think of the bumper stickers of the past.  My absolute favorite is "War is harmful to children and other living things,"  followed closely by "War is not the answer."  It depends on what the question is.  If the questions is, what is a three letter word for an armed conflict, war definitely IS the answer.

Also:  "No war for oil."  And "Obama," "Change," and "Hope.'

Being in Ohio

I just returned from Columbus, OH.  This is where I grew up.  I lived there for 16 years and couldn't wait to get out.  I'm sure Columbus is very nice, and I'm not comparing it to a soviet prison camp or anything.  I was adequately housed and fed and taken to the dentist and saw movies there.  I just wanted to go elsewhere.

So I went to visit the few relatives I have there who are still speaking to me.  Not that those who are not speaking to me are mad at me.  They are just indifferent to my existence, and vice versa.  No hard feelings on either side.  We can live without each other.   And do.

Looking for something to while away the hours when I wasn't visiting one cousin or another, I went to the stand in my motel which housed pamphlets about interesting sites to visit.  Mostly they were ads for outlet shopping centers.  A couple were for extremely boring historic sites, none of which were conveniently located.

I strongly felt the lack of all my aunts and uncles, my mother and grandmother.  I visited them in the cemetery, but couldn't get much out of them.  Communication was lacking.

Wow! People sure are interested in stealing soap

184 people have visited my post on the necessity or morality of stealing soap from hotel rooms!  A burning issue!

Is it okay to steal soap from hotel rooms?

Apparently, it is if you're British.

One of my relatives who travels extensively  has not bought soap in 20 years.  Apparently the complimentary soaps he takes from  hotel rooms fulfill the sanitary needs of his entire family.

Summer reading for young people

One of my young relatives was assigned this book for summer reading.

It tells the maudlin story of a young girl in the 1930's.  Not our happiest decade by a long shot, but this kid is doubly, no triply, unfortunate:  her mom died in childbirth, her dad is a drunk, and she accidentally pour kerosene on her hands, losing parts of her fingers--don't you hate when that happens?  Of course, this is particularly sad for her, as she is a talented pianist.  And to make matters worse, the book is written in blank verse, or free verse.  I can't tell the difference.  Here's a clue--it doesn't rhyme.

Young adult literature used to be clean and cheerful.  The kids went to the malt shop and attended sock hops at school.  They worried about being popular.  The trend in recent years is all the other way.  No subject is too gloomy to serve as the subject of a young adult book:  incest, rape, child abuse, gangs, poverty, criminality--all are the topics of young adult books these days.

I can't understand why kids have to read this drivel.  If you want to teach them about the seamy side of life, why not have them read "Crime and Punishment."?  There's all the poverty and crime you could wish for, and in addition it's a masterpiece.  Why is the Dust Bowl a fitting setting for teenagers rather than Raskolnikov's garret? 

Where's Teddy Roosevelt when you need him?

What the kidnapping and murder of James Foley means. Teddy's response to the kidnapping of an American was a bit different.

Retail therapy

Went shopping with a friend yesterday--she spent $72 and got six garments. That's a little more than 11 dollars per garment and she was happy and gratified. Clothing is so cheap nowadays. For instance, Macy's keeps sending me coupons worth $20 off a $50 purchase. With this coupon I get three or four nice things to wear from the 65 percent off rack. I already have closets filled with nice things to wear, but I can't hurt Macy's feelings, can I? I think they might be going out of business, anyway.

Why am I posting this? Who cares what I wear? Nobody, actually. But I have a point to make. Here are all these cheap clothes and next door are all these people buying large screen televisions at Best Buy. They are dressed like they purchased their clothes from a car wash, after the car wash had used them for a while. On their feet they wear cheap rubber flipflops. Ugh.

Why must everybody look so plebian? So proletarian? If they are broke, why are they buying enormous television sets? It's one of the mysteries of modern life. And why do they have such elaborately painted fingernails? Look at the people rioting in Ferguson, MO. Clearly they are desperately broke, but with nice fingernails. If you are going to riot in the streets and get your picture on the evening news, can't you even dress decently?

Stupid stuff, and plenty of it

I completely concur that "Don't do stupid stuff" is not a viable foreign policy. I hate these slogans that denigrate the intellect of the American public, don't you? Like, "It's the economy,stupid."--oh wait!

Seriously, I hate the lowdown argot of politicians nowadays. They seem to think they are in a pool hall, and not a nice one, either. Both parties are guilty. I personally don't like to be addressed or described as "folks," like some backwoodsman from Andrew Jackson's day. I don't care for the expression "shout out." I don't like to be told, "Read my lips." I'm sure you can think of others.

As for clothing,if I never see another President of the United States dressed in shorts, it will be too soon. Put on your big boy pants, guys! Big boy pants are those that descend to the ankle.

Museum fatigue

I suppose it was a bit of overkill to attempt to visit three museums in one day, but we did it. I loved the Berkshire Musseum in Pittsfield, which has improved immensely over the last three or four years. The second Museum was the Clark, in Willliamstown, which has undergone a rockemsockem renovation and is now a massive, unadorned, inhuman institution which would not have been out of place in Soviet downtown Moscow.

If you admire cinder blocks, this is the museum for you. In the public, non-gallery spaces, there is not a single painting or sculpture. A large shallow pool full of rocks adds an austere beauty, but fails to warm things up.

We did not have time to visit the permanent collection, but a collection of geometric shapes by David Smith was colorful and playful.

Paying kids to lose weight

Where can I sign up?