Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Are muslim men animals who can't control themselves?

Given the evidence, I would have to say yes.

I become a social pariah

I should have known better....It happened in San Francisco. I was dining with four delightful people when I inadvertently disclosed my deepest, most shameful secret.

I don't believe in global warming.

I couldn't have gotten a more shocked reaction if I had offered my grandmother a ham sandwich. Four shocked pairs of eyes. Four horrified gasps. A few feeble attempts to reason with me, then polite disbelief. No-one suggested burning me at the stake, but that was because they didn't want to disturb the ozone layer.

Can't I not believe in global warming? Is it the number one doctrine of the Church of Ecology?

It all reminds me of the last non-disaster that did not overtake us, namely the end of life as we know it which was supposed to occur at the millenium. One of my friends spent 1999 in a swivet because all the computers were going to go down on January 1, 2000. Her preparations for this gathered force as fall '99 approached.

Every second or third day Anne or her husband would withdraw the maximum amount allowed from their bank account, until they had a tidy sum under the mattress. Anne pleaded with her daughter and son-in-law to purchase a generator, and when they refused, she bought them one anyway.

On January 1, 2000, what happened? Nothing. Life went on, and so did the world's computers.

On January 2, 2000, Anne and her husband sheepishly returned $6,000 to their bank account.

I never heard what happened to the generator.

Happy Halloween

 

Now I have to go buy some candy. Posted by Picasa

Monday, October 30, 2006

My neighbor celebrates Halloween

 

I'd hate to have his electric bill. Posted by Picasa

Are some people above criticism?

Criticizing Michael J Fox is like kicking your dog. He's cute, he's sick, he's lovable. But suppose Fox kicks his dog? Are we not allowed to say anything because he has the moral high ground?

Is he allowed to make a manipulative and misleading commercial because he suffers from an illness? Are we not allowed to discuss the merits of his argument?

I'm willing to concede that the man is a highly engaging actor who is suffering from a deadly disease. But this whole stem cell controversy has been removed from the scientific realm and is being framed as a moral issue, which it is not. Stem cell research, embryonic and adult, is legal in all 50 states. There is no law against it. Several states actually fund it, including basket cases like California and New Jersey which would be well advised to spend their money in some more worthy endeavor. The actual result of this funding is to put taxpayers' money in the hands of scientists who want government grant money to carry out their research instead of spending private funds.

The jury is still out on stem cell research. If funds are needed, who not ask George Soros for the money--or Bill Gates? Or some Saudi princeling who has millions to throw around? There are also plenty of private charities who give out money for medical research. I guess it's easier to get it from the government.

However, back to my question: who is immune to criticism? Besides RoPers, I mean.

Here's a partial list, just so you know.

Cindy "absolute moral authority" Sheehan; Michael Berg, peace lover whose son was beheaded and who wears a kefiyeh around his neck; Max Cleland, war hero who was injured during a beer run; Lynne Stewart, professional traitor, attorney, and cancer sufferer.

Who, me?

You Are a "Don't Tread On Me" Libertarian

You distrust the government, are fiercely independent, and don't belong in either party.
Religion and politics should never mix, in your opinion... and you feel opressed by both.
You don't want the government to cramp your self made style. Or anyone else's for that matter.
You're proud to say that you're pro-choice on absolutely everything!

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Friday, October 27, 2006

School of the future

Annoyed librarian is, well, annoyed:


... "School of the Future" in Philadelphia, PA ... doesn't have any books, and doesn't want any! That's for schools of the past! They also don't have any pens and paper, just laptops, thanks to Bill Gates. Not having any books or pens or paper is supposed somehow to help the underprivileged children of Philadelphia. ...
In the Philadelphia school, all the classrooms look like corporate conference rooms, and the students all work on "practical problems," which I guess means they take "consumer math" instead of algebra and write Powerpoint presentations instead of essays. If this is the "school of the future," God help us all.


The people in education are so open-minded that their brains fall out. Every few years there is a new craze that is going to solve the problems in education. Once upon a time it was open classrooms. Tht didn't work. Neither did small class size, a nostrum much loved by the teachers' unions. (More jobs for teachers--it makes sense. To them.) Then there is the campaign to pay more money to the knuckleheads now in charge, in the hopes that if you pay them better they will perform better. Sure they will! Right after I get nominated for Miss America or when pigs fly, whatever comes first.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Beau Biden in trouble?

Yes indeed!

From the Wilmington News Journal:

T

he Delaware Attorney General’s race is in a statistical dead heat, with nearly one-fourth of voters still undecided, an independent poll released today shows.

The poll by Fairleigh Dickinson (N.J.) University’s PublicMind institute found 35 percent of voters support Republican Ferris Wharton, and 34 percent pick Democrat Beau Biden.


Why must the spawn of politicians run for office? Frankly, I'm sick of the Kennedys, the Bidens, the Chaffees, the Reids (as in Harry), etc. Why can't they find honest work?

Take Patrick Kennedy, for instance. He has all the makings of a fine manual laborer. If he can master the necessary computer skills, he could serve honorably as a cashier at Target. He could be a crossing guard. The possibilities are endless.

I feel sorry for my grandchildren, who will probably be given a choice between Chelsea Clinton and Jenna or Barbara Bush.

It doesn't have to be that way. These individuals should post their resumes on Monster.com--I understand you can get jobs that way--and make an honest living.

Never happen.

Murtha Campaign Poster

Carnival of the Vanities is up

and a very interesting collection it is. This is number 214!

Hot new fashions

From Hepzibah, one of my commentors:
What's on the fashion horizon for this spring? Burkas.

If she's right, we'd better not be caught with our pants down, figuratively. So I trolled the web for some burkas to suit the fashion-forward American woman.

<





This one is the Full Monty, so to speak; I can't tell whether this is a front or a back view. Possibly neither. It might be draped over a chair. A great choice for the mature woman, and can also be used as a slipcover for your sofa.


This little number would be perfect for the Easter Parade. Discreet, but sweet.








This one is for the young and daring. Perfect for the senior prom!

There now--that's not so bad, is it?

And just think: you needn't worry about driving some poor Muslim youth mad with lust, causing him to rape you, which will then be your fault.

Except--I don't know--perhaps the pink one is a little over the top?

My kind of coffee

You Are a Frappacino

At your best, you are: fun loving, sweet, and modern

At your worst, you are: childish and over indulgent

You drink coffee when: you're craving something sweet

Your caffeine addiction level: low

Another day, another dentist




It seems to me that at least once a year I find myself sitting with my mouth open, being tortured by one or more dentists. It's not for nothing that various horrors are described as "worse than a root canal."

Well, I'm well past the root canal phase. Never mind how I got there, but I am now condemned to wear a temporary, removable bridge for the next six months. The nasty thing feels something like a gigantic hunk of chewing gum stuck to the roof of my mouth. Or like an enemy alien has come to live in my mouth. Only worse. I hate it. It's also funny-looking, with a long canine tooth that does not match my own teeth and makes me look like a vampire. Great for Halloween.

I have to take care of this obscene object. It must be kept in water, like a live goldfish. I'm not supposed to chew anything hard. Believe me, there is no temptation to do so. I don't think I will ever attempt to chew again.

Now I know why my grandmother hated to wear her false teeth. She generally kept them in a pocket of her housedress except on ceremonial occasions.

Muslim hatemongering mullah agrees with Pascal

Tim Blair denounces a sheik who thinks a woman who is raped is to blame because she is immodest:

The sheik...said: “If she was in her room, in her home, in her hijab, no problem would have occurred."


According to Pascal: "All man's miseries come from his inability to sit quietly in his room."

He preceded this, however, with: "All generalizations, including this one, are false."

So I guess Blaise P and the holy man are not on the same page after all. Oh, well.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Today is St Crispin's Day

A nice snippet from the Kenneth Branagh version of Henry V. Shakespeare's words are stirring:

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile,
This day shall gentle his condition:
And gentlemen in England now a-bed
Shall think themselves accursed they were not here,
And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks
That fought with us upon Saint Crispin's day.


Somehow pacificism doesn't move hearts as martial virtues do. As George Orwell said, boys play with toy soldiers; toy pacifists will not do.

What was this battle all about? Who knows? A bit of France won by England, then won back. By all accounts, Henry V was a dunderhead. But so what? He still lives, and will, as long as Shakespeare is read and English is spoken.

Be careful of us old people

We can be mean.

Another triumph for the codger/codgerette demographic.

Remember her?

Palestinian brain drain

These people have brains?

I know it's mean of me, so don't write and tell me that I am not being fair to these folks. That is exactly the point. I'm tired of trying to be fair.

How many brains does it take to:

Celebrate your independence by shooting each other and torching buildings?

Destroy greenhouses built by Israelis, which were given to you in hopes you could make a living?

Shoot bullets into the air on festive occasions, sometimes resulting in the celebrants being killed?

Be happy your son or daughter blew him/herself up? Rejoice at the funeral?


I think the brains departed long ago. If ever there were a people unfitted for self-government, it's this bunch.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Naked lady tries to get youth to stop playing basketball

But the judge says it's okay.

A judge in Riverside, Calif., has dismissed an indecent-exposure charge against a woman accused of sitting naked on her sun deck in a bid to "drive away" a teenage boy who was making too much noise playing basketball next door.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Violence is out of control in Iraq


Only, unfortunately, this picture is of French Muslim youth rioting in France.

Police there are calling this an infitada:

One small police union claims officers are facing a "permanent intifada." Police injuries have risen in the year since the wave of violence.

National police reported 2,458 cases of violence against officers in the first six months of the year, on pace to top the 4,246 cases recorded for all of 2005 and the 3,842 in 2004. Firefighters and rescue workers have also been targeted - and some now receive police escorts in such areas.

On Sunday, a band of about 30 youths, some wearing masks, forced passengers out of a bus in a southern Paris suburb in broad daylight Sunday, set it on fire, then stoned firefighters who came to the rescue....
More broadly, worsening violence in France testifies to Europe's growing struggle to integrate its ethnic minorities. Some mainstream European politicians - adopting positions previously confined largely to far-right fringes - are suggesting that the minorities themselves are not doing enough to adapt to European mores.

[]
Ethnic integration and violence against police are both becoming issues in the campaign for the French presidency. Interior Minister Nicolas Sarkozy, the leading contender on the right, said this month that those who do not love France do not have to stay, echoing a longtime slogan of the extreme-right National Front: "France, love it or leave it."

Michel Thooris, head of the small Action Police union, claims that the new violence is taking on an Islamic fundamentalist tinge.

"Many youths, many arsonists, many vandals behind the violence do it to cries of 'Allah Akbar' (God is Great) when our police cars are stoned," he said in an interview. []

Sadio Sylla, an unemployed mother of three, watched the Oct. 13 ambush of the police patrol in Epinay-sur-Seine from her second-floor window. She, other witnesses and police union officials said up to 50 masked youths surged out from behind trees.

One of the three officers needed 30 stitches to his face after being struck by a rock.

The attack was one of at least four gang beatings of police in Parisian suburbs since Sept. 19. Early Friday, a dozen hooded people hurled stones, iron bars and bottles filled with gasoline at two police vehicles in Aulnay-sous-Bois, a flashpoint of last year's riots, said Guillaume Godet, a city hall spokesman. One officer required three stitches to his head.

[]


Police unions suspect that the recent attacks may be an attempt to spark new riots.

"We are getting the impression these youths want a 'remake' of what happened last year," said Fred Lagache, national secretary of the Alliance police union. "The youths are trying to cause a police error to justify chaos."



It must be a great year for Renault sales.

Odd couples

There are two kinds of people: people who like to be prompt, who would show up for their own hanging ten minutes early in case there is some last minute paperwork; and the other sort.

I myself am a promptie, as you can guess. My son-in-law is a promptie, too. My daughter, his wife, not. This leads to some interesting exchanges.

My mother was definitely of the non-prompt sort. My Uncle Max, her brother, was compulsive about being, not on time, but early.

So Max would tell my mother to be ready by say, 7:30. He would arrive at 7:15, to find she had just gotten into the bathtub. The more he fumed, the slower she got, as she stopped getting dressed to discuss the subject with him. Then she would have to: leave a note for the cleaning lady; find her glasses; find her other glasses; find her purse; and call my brother to tell him she was leaving now. Then she got into the car, but discovered she had mislaid her keys and rushed back into the house.

This sort of thing only went on for about 50 years. Neither one adjusted or compromised. He was early, she was late, until she died.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Bush's Iraq problem

I've been saying this, but not nearly as well:

So we as a nation — and I’m speaking of the collective awareness, here, the wisdom of the crowd — knew only that we were invading a foreign country. We didn’t know why, and we didn’t know what was going to happen next. And today, more than three years on, we still don’t know why and we still don’t know what’s going to happen next.

Now, there are many conflicting opinions about the root cause of this colossal failure of leadership. ...

I don’t have the foggiest idea why the President failed to lead the country into war, or once into it why he failed to lead us through it. Hell, given the state of the press and the vitriolic hatred of the President since his first disputed and messy election, maybe nothing he did or said could have gotten the job done. You can’t inform or persuade people who aren’t listening.

But that doesn’t excuse not trying.

The evolved-American community

Courtesy of bobbydoodle.

Naughty words

but only in Israel and Quebec.

Oh, that's all right then.

Courtesy of towncrier.

Goodbye to California

 
The ferry from Tiburon to Angel Island Posted by Picasa

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Shoes, shoes, shoes!

Air Force Wife blames her poor driving performance partly on shoes:

And, of course, one part of my brain is always thinking about shoes.

I admit to spending many hours and a lot of money on shoes, but I have my reasons.

1. None of the shoes I currently own are comfortable. They fit beautifully in the store, but some kind of metamorphosis (sp?) overtakes them in the closet. My feet change shape, sometimes overnight, like magic and the shoes don't fit. They could be too large on Monday and okay on Tuesday; they could rub against part of my foot; they could just generally hang off my feet and refuse to be worn. My shoes are the terrorists of my closet.

2. You need a different pair of shoes for every outfit. As I have said, les shoes juste are the essential ingredient in the get-up. The right shoes: dynamite appearance; wrong shoes: hopeless. Might as well stay home.

3. Storage problems. I have a rule: I cannot have more pairs of shoes than I have closet space to put them. This rule is often broken, but I keep a bag in the corner of the room for the Good Will, and I try to weed the shoe collection frequently. After all, I only have two feet.

4. I usually wear the same (fairly comfortable) shoes every day for a week, then become tired of them. They start to look shopworn, somehow. Old shoes---don't they look awful? Would you ever wear someone else's shoes? Ugh.

Those people like Jackie O and Imelda Marcus, who order each pair of shoes in every color--how do they make shoe decisions?

Oy vey!

Here we go go again.

Anti-Semitic incidents have proliferated in France in recent times, but the news seldom makes it across the Atlantic and when it does, it must still fight to be heard above the constant melodrama of constant trivia. A Jewish sports club in Toulouse attacked with Molotov cocktails; in Bondy, 15 men beat up members of a Jewish soccer team with metal bars and sticks; the bus that takes Jewish children to school in Aubervilliers attacked thrice in the past 14 months, synagogues in Strasbourg and Marseilles and a Jewish school in Creteil firebombed in recent weeks; in Toulouse, a gunman opened fire -- all ignored in the mainstream media in the U.S.

The metropolitan Paris police tabulated 10 to 12 anti-Jewish incidents per day in the past 30 days throughout the country.


French Jews are emigrating to Israel because it's safer.

Stop the presses!

The case of the dog that did not bark in the nighttime: Dick Cheney sinisterly (is that a word? it is now) does not repeat a story he has told at least 67 times:

After a sustained and rollicking ovation that inspires a rare smile with both sides of his mouth, Mr. Cheney starts into a variant of the same talk he has delivered literally hundreds of times....

He skips the bit about how he had been the lone congressman from Wyoming — “It was a small delegation, but it was quality,” which he has told at least 67 times as vice president.


Obviously, there's dirty work afoot.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Bush's fatal flaw

Really good analysis at lead and gold:

1. [T]he Bush administration has been inept at the art of the deal. It capitulates on some issues but never gets the quid pro quo that allows it to achieve any of its conservative objectives.

2. On some of the biggest issues, the administration's actions have not matched its rhetoric. Take the revelations about secret operations in the War on Terror. The right was outraged. I suspect that a majority of Americans are opposed to intelligence officials who break their oaths and leak secrets to the Times and the Post. Yet, there is no indication that Bush and his appointees are serious about dealing with the arrogant bureaucrats who broke the law.
Net message of #1 and #2: The Bush style is to placate his enemies and ignore his base. (It may be a family trait.)


There's more. Read it.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

We had virtual sex

and now we have a virtual sex scandal:

Who would have thought, even ten short years ago, that it would be possible someday to have a political sex scandal where no one involved actually had sex with each other? The advances in immorality these days are nothing less than mind-boggling, I tell you.


I know I promised to lay off Foley.* But the parade of hypocrisy is just too much fun.

* This is the spot where disapproval of Foley is inserted. Sample: "I, of course, do not condone his actions." Or insert the mandatory condemnation here: jerk, degenerate, hypocrite, a**hat. Your choice. Just so everybody knows we are not excusing the poor jerk--in any way.

Packing light--or not

Whenever I pack my bags for a trip, I try to pack light. As all seasoned travelers know, this is the way to go. But I end up packing heavy. And I never bring the right thing anyway.

For one thing, a woman can't go anywhere without at least four pairs of shoes. Not even overnight. For a ten-day trip, you can imagine how many shoes are needed. It is a question of bringing the shoes juste for every outfit. Every outfit has its own shoe karma--the difference between dressing for success and looking like a slob is having the exactly right pair of shoes. Then you have to bring sneakers, because God forbid you actually have to walk somewhere, they are the only shoes you can actually wear without bringing tears to your eyes. And involuntary but deeply felt groans from your lips.

Then there's the weather thing. Last time I went to California, in February, I asked my daughter what to bring. She assured me that they have winter in California and wear winter clothes. So I packed nice warm sweaters, etc. At the last minute, I threw in two t-shirts, basically to sleep in. I wore one or the other every day. The rest of the stuff was just brought along for the ride.

In early August I went for a cruise. Envisioning sunny days by the pool, I brought two bathing suits. Rain, wind, and fog ensued, so I bought a jacket and a sweatshirt on the ship, and became a walking advertisement for Carnival Victory.

When I went to Massachusetts later in August, I took lightweight summer clothes. Just one bathing suit. It rained and was freezing every day. Fortunately there was a Marshall's near our hotel, so we both purchased warm jackets. I had only two pairs of jeans with me. But I forgot to bring along a belt, and the low-slung pair kept falling off unless I held them up firmly with one hand. Since those were my only warm clothes, I bought a belt in Marshall's.

You can buy some of the stuff you forget if you are going to civilized countries, usually. But have you ever tried to purchase dental floss threaders in St. John's New Brunswick? Or Brushpiks.

Suitcases. None of mine are the right size. I have two small ones which are okay for overnight, as long as you have a garment bag. I have two humongous ones which could carry a load a bricks each, if I felt the need for a load of bricks. I don't.

Just lots of shoes.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Carnival of the Vanities

is up!

I'm going to California



Back on the 21st.

Now watch my readership plummet.

A great new cookbook for the 21st century

Reserve a copy for Bill Clinton.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Which movie am I?



I don't even like this movie.

Stop the presses!

The good news: Mark Foley (please insert the mandatory expression of disapproval here, such as "I don't approve of his actions" or "he's a douchebag") actually had sex with pages!

The bad news: They were over 18.

Another important Democratic issue bites the dust.

Now can we get on with saving the world from the Axis of Evil? Or watching the game?

Life after death: the proof




Dedicated Democratic voters
rise from their graves.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Is Target Republican or Democrat?

Some businesses, things and people just seem to naturally belong to one political party or the other. For instance: Target, Democratic; WalMart, Republican. Sears, Democratic, Macy's Republican; Margarine, Democratic, butter, Republican. High-priced prescriptions, Republican, generic, Democratic. The miniskirt, Democratic, the little black dress with pearls Republican; tattoos, Democratic, Botox, Republican; hot dogs, Democratic, knackwurst Republican; Kraft cheddar cheese, Democratic, havarti cheese, Republican.

Whole wheat bread that tastes like wood pulp, Democratic; Wonder Bread, Republican; mayonnaise, Republican, mustard, Democratic. Heavy perfume, Democratic, light scent, Republican.

I could go on like this all day, but I thought I'd give my readers a chance to weigh in. What's Republican or Democratic to you?

What's worst about waking up at 5 a.m.?

on a Saturday?

Bad: getting out of bed at 8:00 am on a Saturday morning.

Worse: being awake since 5:00 am in said bed.

Ahhh, the joys of an abysmal sleep pattern.


I'll tell you what's worse. You wake up at 2 a.m., go back to bed at 3:30, and have really boring and tedious dreams.

I read somewhere that conservatives have duller dreams than liberals, and I'm here to tell you that it's true. At least for me.

Last night, I pulled the 2 a.m.-3:30 sleepless shift. Slept until 8. Looked at the clock. Went back to sleep, and dreamed I was cleaning. Even worse, I was back in my old house and my children were teens, and I was cleaning their rooms! The horror!

I got so tired from these non-restful dreams that I woke myself up, exhausted.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

The Amish show the rest of us what a class act looks like

Their forebearance humbles the rest of us.

You know what's astounding? The Amish forgave the killer and his family. And, if those creepo phoney Baptists at Westover had actually disrupted their daughters' funerals, the Amish would have forgiven them, too. There's the best and worst of American Christianity for you, right there in one easy-to-swallow tableau.


Contrast this with our most famous professional victim:

You go, Church of England!

I didn't know they had it in them.

The Church of England has launched an astonishing attack on the Government's drive to turn Britain into a multi-faith society.

In a wide-ranging condemnation of policy, it says that the attempt to make minority "faith" communities more integrated has backfired, leaving society "more separated than ever before". The criticisms are made in a confidential Church document, leaked to The Sunday Telegraph, that challenges the "widespread description" of Britain as a multi-faith society and even calls for the term "multi-faith" to be reconsidered.


It claims that divisions between communities have been deepened by the Government's "schizophrenic" approach to tackling multiculturalism. [I]t has actually given "privileged attention" to the Islamic faith and Muslim communities....

[T]he paper says that the Church of England has been sidelined. Instead, "preferential" treatment has been afforded to the Muslim community despite the fact that it makes up only three per cent of the population. ...

The leaked report follows a week of tension in which a Muslim policeman was excused armed guard duty at the Israeli embassy in London, Asian and white youths clashed in Windsor, and Jack Straw suggested that Muslim women should not wear the full veil across the face in public.

The report lists a number of moves made by the Government since the London bombings in July last year to win favour with Muslim communities. These include "using public funds" to fly Muslim scholars to Britain, shelving legislation on forced marriage and encouraging financial arrangements to comply with Islamic requirements. These efforts have undermined its interfaith agenda and produced no "noticeable positive impact on community cohesion", the Church document says.

"Indeed, one might argue that disaffection and separation is now greater than ever, with Muslim

communities withdrawing further into a sense of victimhood, and other faith communities seriously concerned that the Government has given signals that appear to encourage the notion of a privileged relationship with sections of the Muslim community."
[]


"In relation to faith, there has been a divided, almost schizophrenic approach," the briefing paper says. The Government was misguided in "scapegoating the Muslim community as the source of the problem at the same time as believing that they should be uniquely responsible for solutions". It goes on: "The contribution of the Church of England in particular and of Christianity in general to the underlying culture remains very substantial."

The 2001 census showed that 72 per cent of Britons describe themselves as Christian. "It could certainly be argued that there is an agenda behind a claim that a five per cent adherence to 'other faiths' makes for a multi-faith society," says the document.



Does this mean the majority is going to stand up to the schoolyard bully? Stay tuned.

Friday, October 06, 2006

Our family go-to guy

Every family has one. In our case, it is my cousin Bernie. Need a lawyer? Call Bernie. Ditto help with your income tax. But his one irreplaceable function is as the family death and funeral person.

When someone dies, for instance my mother, Bernie takes over. He talks to the rabbi, the funeral director, picks out the casket, decides on the pallbearers, and calls everybody who needs to be called. I was very grateful to him and so was my brother, for sparing us these necessary but unpleasant tasks.

When his sister's husband was killed, she immediately called Bernie, and he was on the next plane. He then called the funeral director, the rabbi, etc. I believe he even identified the body, a gruesome task since the man was hit by a car.

Bernie has become a really great judge of casket quality and price by now. He's good on the phone, too. Except, by now, a phone call from him is bad news. When you answer the phone and it is Bernie, your heart sinks to your boots.

The last good news phone call I got from him was when his last daughter was born, and she's a mother herself by now.

But what really gets me going is this: who's going to do all this stuff when Bernie dies? And who will be the next go-to guy?

Who else is Jewish?

Wouldn't you like to know? Now that George Allen has been outed--and how was his bar mitzvah speech, anyway?--it has come to my attention that there are many others of us out there whom no-one suspects. There used to be a prominent list of us available at my Sunday School, but it's been a while.

A site called Jew of the Day lists some names you would never associate with chosenness. I think Elvis Presley used to be on the list. His mother had a Jewish grandmother, maybe. They appear to have eliminated him from the list, perhaps on the assumption that no Jew would eat fried peanut butter and banana sandwiches when bagels were available. It would be like a Frenchman preferring Wonder Bread to baguettes.

Some possibles: what about Pablo Neruda? His real name was Neftali something-or-other, and he had a big nose and was a Communist. What more proof do you need?

Then there's Geraldo Rivera. And Fiorella la Guardia. Herman Badillo? He went to City College, which makes him definitely suspect.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Muslim policemen have feelings, too...

Their supervisors should not offend their sensibilities.

A report in The Sun newspaper alleged that that senior officers within the Metropolitan Police Diplomatic Protection Group gave Pc Alexander Omar Basha a special dispensation after he raised “moral” concerns because of Isaeli bombings in Lebanon.

This claim unleashed a fierce debate about the duties of a police officer. But representatives of the Muslim Police Association denied the decision was based on moral concerns, suggesting it was a “welfare issue.”

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

I had to copy this



Everyone's favorite unindicted conspirator.

Stolen from purple avenger.

Picking on the wrong kind of terrorists

and trampling their civil liberties. Shame!

Writing at MSNBC, NBC's News Investigation Unit has uncovered a government report indicating that terrorists' mail is still not monitored:
...Of course most of us would probably naively prefer that terrorist correspondence should probably be ripped open as soon as it passes between the iron bars, so that any terrorist attacks being planned or supported can be nipped in the bud before they kill us.

But then again, what if the terrorists were writing to journalists?

As they've been quick to point out in recent months, journalists are regularly in contact with all manner of unsavory characters, and how is the government supposed to be sure the mail it's reading is not actually addressed to journalists engaged in the discovery of terrorists' deeper truths and heart-wrenchingly tragic stories? []
In this case we're all supposed to be upset that these particular terrorists are NOT having their mail monitored. Yet at the same time we're also so supposed to be upset that certain other terrorists ARE having their phone conversations monitored.

But I realize the distinction is not so simple, even if the reporters didn't bother explaining the difference in the remainder of their report. There is indeed an obvious answer why some terrorists should be spied on, while others should be left free to pursue their murderous plans unhindered by US government surveillance.

The terrorists whose mail should be monitored are in JAIL. The terrorists who should be left free to kill us are running free on the global BATTLEFIELD. That's a big difference.

In prosecuting the Global Litigation Against Terror, it is clear the government should be carefully monitoring those who are already locked up after having been convicted of a crime, since their rights are therefore already legally circumscribed anyway based on the Constitution or ACLU position papers or something like that. But terrorists running around on the battlefield without uniforms, well, who can even tell them apart from the innocents who merely finance their operations? Plus, they've got rights that haven't even been read to them yet.

Taking names

The folks at the world can't wait prepare a useful list:

On October 5, people everywhere will walk out of school, take off work, and come to the downtowns & townsquares and set out from there, going through the streets and calling on many more to join us - making a powerful statement: "NO! THIS REGIME DOES NOT REPRESENT US! AND WE WILL DRIVE IT OUT!"

Growing list of speakers at rallies including Rev. Dr. Michael Eric Dyson, Cynthia McKinney, Tom Morello, Michelle Phillips, Thom Hartmann, Rabbi Lerner, Daniel Ellsberg, Jodie Evans, Imam Abdul-Alim Musa, Ann Wright,with special messages from Sean Penn, Paul Haggis, Mark Ruffalo, Eve Ensler & many more....


Excellent list. Now I can religiously avoid patronizing any film, play, or journal that gives these people employment.

Hey--what about the Dixie Chicks? Couldn't they make it?

What really happened in Vietnam?

We betrayed people who were counting on us:

Vietnam was lost in the halls of Congress, mainly because conservatives who knew better finally caved to the twin assaults of the anti-war Left and the nascent advocacy journalism movement. How many of you knew that, in our “defeat” during the Tet Offensive the Viet Cong, those black-pajamaed folk heroes of the Left, were virtually annihilated, never able to muster a force above company strength after their losses in Tet?

How many of you know that the Army of the Republic of Vietnam, the ARVN, had taken over their country’s defense, that the last American combat soldiers had been withdrawn, long before the end of the war? What happened? Congressional liberals, triumphant after the successful propaganda campaign that brought them to power, decided that our former allies should get not one more penny in military aid. ARVN troops were sent into the field with three rounds apiece while their medics washed bandages to be reused. That’s what they had with which to face the Soviet-supported North, who swept into South Vietnam with more armor than the Wehrmacht sent into Poland.

Thus was the sacrifice of 58,000 American dead negated. Thus began the real horror, and the bloodbaths in southeast Asia, while the American Press averted their gaze from the millions who died in the aftermath. It took decades for our military to recover from this betrayal.


Bloodbaths? Do you remember bloodbaths? Do you remember US helicopters taking off with our Vietnamese allies trying desperately to cling to them? Boat people?

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Nothing more to say about Mark Foley

He resigned.

Meanwhile, he has gone into a rehab.

Rehab seems to be a kind of summer camp for errant Congressmen.

Was the battle of Midway a disaster...

for the Americans?

Ancient quagmire unearthed.

Monday, October 02, 2006

Miraculous substance...

It bucks you right up. Why?

Zebra Cartilage is rich in bingo acids and oxymorons....

Take that, Hugo Chavez

Alaskan islanders tell Venezuelan a**hat where to shove it:


ANCHORAGE, Alaska (AP) -- An offer of free heating oil from a critic of President Bush will be rejected by four remote Alaska villages.

Leaders of the Aleutian Pribilof Islands Association said Thursday that they will not accept oil for residents of Nelson Lagoon, Atka, St. Paul and St. George offered by Venezuela President Hugo Chavez out of loyalty to Bush and the country.

Chavez last week called President Bush "a devil" and made other inflammatory comments about the United States.

"Despite the critical need for fuel in our region, the Unangan (Aleut) people are Americans first, and we cannot support the political agenda attached to this donation," leaders of the Aleutian Pribilof Islands Association said in a prepared statement Thursday.

[]

Critics say Chavez through the gift is trying to make President Bush and the U.S. government look as if they do not care for their own people. Chavez also supports Iran's nuclear ambitions.
The four villages face heating fuel costs between $5 and $6 a gallon, according to the association. They were the only villages in the region scheduled to receive fuel.


You go, Unangans!


Ht to Atlanta rofters.

Carnivals of this 'n that

Carnival of Comedy and Carnival of the Insanities are both up for your reading pleasure.

Enjoy your day



Query: When does a day last 25 1/2 hours?

Answer: When it's Yom Kippur.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

A modest proposal

Trouble is brewing in Paradise. The Palis are all pissed off because they aren't getting foreign aid.


Rival Palestinian security forces have clashed across the Gaza Strip killing three and injuring at least 45 others following demonstrations by police and civil servants demanding payment of wages....


In the West Bank city of Ramallah, supporters of president Mahmoud Abbas's Fatah movement ransacked the offices of the Hamas-led government before setting the building ablaze.

Most of those hurt in the fighting appear to be civilians....

Tensions between the two sides have been stoked by the collapse of talks aimed at building a unity government. The biggest stumbling block has been Hamas' refuse to recognise Israel, a stance which has resulted in western donors cutting off aid needed to pay public servants.


Proposal: Why don't they get themselves a self-sufficient economy, pay their own civil servants, and tell Israel to go to hell?

Question: If they're so poor, where do they get the money for bullets to shoot each other and gasoline to burn each other up?

Just asking.

Move over, George Allen

Another Jew outed.

Vast left-wing conspiracy?

Hmmm.

My interview with Basil

Get over there.